EnglishΆρχισες να σκέφτεσαι πώς μπορείς να σχεδιάσεις το πλάνο της δικής σου ασφάλειας και ευτυχίας; Εάν περιμένεις από τον/την κακοποιητικό/ή σύντροφό σου να αλλάξει και προσπαθείς περισσότερο να τον/την ευχαριστείς, αυτό δε θα δουλέψει. Ενημερώσου για τις διαθέσιμες πηγές που υπάρχουν στην περιοχή σου για τα άτομα που δέχονται ενδοοικογενειακή βία. Όταν θα είσαι ασφαλής και δε θα είναι παρόν ο/η κακοποιητικός/ή σύντροφος, τότε κάλεσε τη γραμμή στήριξης 1440. Μίλησε για όσα σου συμβαίνουν, μάθε τα διακιώματά σου και διερεύνησε τις επιλογές σου για να προστατέψεις τον εαυτό σου.
- Προσδιόρισε τον βαθμό σωματικής δύναμης του/της συντρόφου σου για να μπορείς να υπολογίσεις το ρίσκο του δικού σου σωματικού κινδύνου, καθώς και των παιδιών σου.
- Βρες ασφαλή σημεία του σπιτιού όπου υπάρχουν τρόποι διαφυγής. Εάν χρειαστεί, προσπάθησε να μεταφερθείς σε αυτά τα σημεία.
- Απέφυγε να τρέξεις προς τα σημεία που είναι τα παιδιά, καθώς ο/η σύντροφός σου μπορεί να πληγώσει και αυτά.
- Εάν η κακοποίηση είναι αναπόφευκτη, προσπάθησε να κάνεις τον εαυτό σου μικρό στόχο. Μαζέψου σε μια γωνιά του σπιτιού σαν μια μπάλα με το πρόσωπό σου προστατευμένο και με τα χέρια σου να καλύπτουν κάθε πλευρά του κεφαλιού σου και τα δάκτυλα των χεριών σου ενωμένα.
- Εάν είναι δυνατόν, να έχεις πρόσβαση σε τηλέφωνο όλες τις ώρες της ημέρας και να γνωρίζεις αριθμούς βοήθειας. Εάν η ζωή σου είναι σε κίνδυνο κάλεσε την αστυνομία.
- Μίλησε σε άτομα της εμπιστοσύνης σου (φίλους, γείτονες, συγγενείς) για την κατάσταση και ανέπτυξε σχέδιο με ποιους τρόπους θα ζητήσεις βοήθεια.
- Μάθε στα παιδιά σου πώς να παίρνουν βοήθεια. Καθοδήγησέ τους να μην εμπλέκονται όταν είναι σε εξέλιξη περιστατικό κακοποίησης. Βρες μια λέξη κωδικό για τα παιδιά που θα σημαίνει ότι θα πρέπει να ψάξουν για βοήθεια ή να φύγουν από το σπίτι.
- Πες στα παιδιά σου ότι η βία δεν είναι ποτέ δικαιολογημένη, έστω και αν κάποιος που αγαπούν είναι βίαιος. Πες τους ότι ούτε εσύ, ούτε τα ίδια φταίνε ή είναι η αιτία για τη βία που δέχονται και πως όταν κάποιος είναι βίαιος, είναι σημαντικό να προστατεύονται.
- Εξασκήσου στο πώς να διαφεύγεις με ασφάλεια. Εξασκήσου μαζί με τα παιδιά σου.
- Δημιούργησε πλάνο για το τι θα κάνεις σε περίπτωση που τα παιδιά μιλήσουν στον σύντροφο/σύζυγο ή αν ο σύντροφος/σύζυγος μάθει για το σχέδιό σας.
- Κράτησε όπλα και μαχαίρια κλειδωμένα σε σημεία όσο το δυνατό περισσότερο απρόσιτα.
- Απόκτησε τη συνήθεια να σταθμεύεις το αυτοκίνητο σε σημείο που μπορείς να διαφύγεις και να έχει πάντα καύσιμα.
- Προσπάθησε να μη φοράς κασκόλ ή μακριά κοσμήματα τα οποία θα μπορούσαν να χρησιμοποιηθούν για να σε στραγγαλίσουν ή να σε τραυματίσουν.
- Δημιούργησε αρκετές πιθανές αφορμές για να φεύγεις από το σπίτι, διαφορετικές ώρες της μέρας και νύχτας.
Σχέδιο ασφαλείας με τα παιδιά
Αν είσαι σε μια κακοποιητική σχέση, ένα σχέδιο ασφαλείας πρέπει να εμπεριέχει τρόπους που τα παιδιά σου μπορούν να προστατευτούν, όταν υπάρχει βία στο σπίτι. Είναι σημαντικό να θυμάσαι ότι αν η βία αρχίσει να κλιμακώνεται πρέπει να αποφύγεις να τρέξεις προς στα παιδιά, επειδή ο/η σύντροφός/σύζυγός σου μπορεί να τα βλάψει και αυτά.
Πλάνο ασφαλείας για τη βία στο σπίτι
- Δίδαξε τα παιδιά πότε και πώς να καλούν την άμεση δράση (199 ή 112)
- Καθοδήγησε τα παιδιά να φύγουν από το σπίτι, αν είναι δυνατό, όταν η βία αρχίζει να κλιμακώνεται και ενημέρωσέ τα πως να μεταβούν σε ασφαλές μέρος.
- Βρες μια λέξη-κωδικό που μπορείς να τους λες όταν χρειάζεται να φύγουν από το σπίτι σε περίπτωση ανάγκης και βεβαιώσου ότι γνωρίζουν πως δεν πρέπει να αναφέρουν σε άλλους τι σημαίνει η λέξη αυτή.
- Στο σπίτι: Ορίστε ένα δωμάτιο στο οποίο μπορούν να πηγαίνουν όταν είναι φοβισμένα και κάτι που μπορούν να σκέφτονται όταν φοβούνται.
- Καθοδήγησε τα παιδιά να μείνουν μακριά από την κουζίνα, το μπάνιο και άλλα σημεία στο σπίτι όπου υπάρχουν αντικείμενα που μπορούν να χρησιμοποιηθούν ως όπλα.
- Δίδαξέ τα ότι παρόλο που θέλουν να προστατεύσουν το γονιό τους δεν πρέπει ποτέ να παρεμβαίνουν.
- Βοήθησέ τα να κάνουν μια λίστα με ανθρώπους που νιώθουν άνετα να μιλήσουν και να εκφραστούν.
- Ενέπλεξέ τα σε θεραπευτικά εργαστήρια για παιδιά. Μπορείς να αποταθείς στον Δήμο που διαμένεις για πληροφορίες και στον Σύνδεσμο για την Πρόληψη και Αντιμετώπιση της Βίας στην Οικογένεια.
Πλάνο ασφαλείας για επισκέψεις χωρίς επίβλεψη
Εάν έχεις χωρίσει από έναν/μια σύντροφο με κακοποιητική συμπεριφορά και ανησυχείς για την ασφάλεια των παιδιών όταν επισκέπτονται τον/την πρώην σύντροφο, ανέπτυξε ένα πλάνο ασφαλείας για να επωφεληθούν τα παιδιά κατά τις επισκέψεις.
Σκέψου με τα παιδιά σου (εάν είναι αρκετά μεγάλα) ιδέες για το πώς μπορούν να παραμείνουν ασφαλή χρησιμοποιώντας τον ίδιο τρόπο εάν γινόταν στο δικό σου σπίτι. Βοήθα να αναγνωρίσουν πώς μπορούν να βρουν το τηλέφωνο, πώς μπορούν να φύγουν από το σπίτι και σε ποιον μπορούν να πάνε.
Εάν είναι ασφαλές, δώσε στα παιδιά ένα κινητό για να χρησιμοποιήσουν στις επείγουσες καταστάσεις, όπως για να καλέσουν το 199, ένα γείτονα ή εσένα εάν χρειάζονται βοήθεια.
Σχεδιασμός για ασφαλή πραγματοποίηση της επικοινωνίας των παιδιών με τον άλλο γονέα
Μπορείς να έχεις κάποιο φιλικό ή συγγενικό πρόσωπο μαζί σου για την πραγματοποίηση της επικοινωνίας των παιδιών με τον άλλο γονέα.
Συναισθηματικό πλάνο ασφαλεία: Σκέψου μια δραστηριότητα πριν την πραγματοποίηση της συνάντησης για να είσαι ήρεμος/η και κάτι μετά τη συνάντηση. Επικεντρώσου στον ευατό ή στα παιδιά σου, όπως για παράδειγμα να πάτε σε ένα πάρκο ή να κάνετε μια διασκεδαστική δραστηριότητα.
Ενημέρωσε τα παιδιά σου ότι δε φταίνε γι’ αυτό που συμβαίνει και ότι δεν το προκάλεσαν αυτά. Πες πόσο τα αγαπάς και ότι τα στηρίζεις ό,τι και αν συμβεί. Πες ότι θες να τα προστατέψεις, γι’ αυτό πρέπει να έχετε ένα πλάνο για τις επείγουσες περιπτώσεις. Είναι σημαντικό να θυμάσαι πως όταν φτιάχνεις το σχέδιο ασφαλείας με τα παιδιά σου, μπορεί να μεταφέρουν αυτές τις πληροφορίες στον άλλο γονέα, το οποίο θα κάνει την κατάσταση πιο επικίνδυνη (πχ «Η μαμά είπε να κάνουμε αυτό όταν θυμώσεις.»). Όταν συζητάς για το σχέδιο ασφαλείας με τα παιδιά σου χρησιμοποίησε φράσεις όπως «Δοκιμάζουμε αυτό το σχέδιο σε περιπτώσεις έκτακτης ανάγκης» αντί το «Δοκιμάζουμε αυτό το σχέδιο σε περίπτωση που η μαμά/ο μπαμπάς γίνει βίαιος».
Η εγκυμοσύνη είναι μια περίοδος αλλαγής η οποία μπορεί να είναι γεμάτη ενθουσιασμό, αλλά να χρειάζεσαι συναισθηματική στήριξη από τον σύντροφό σου, πιθανή οικονομική στήριξη, βοήθεια για την προετοιμασία του παιδιού και πολλά άλλα.
Εάν ο σύντροφος σου είναι συναισθηματικά ή σωματικά κακοποιητικός προς εσένα, αυτή η περίοδος αλλαγής μπορεί να είναι ιδιαίτερα δύσκολη. Η εγκυμοσύνη μπορεί να είναι μια ιδιαίτερα επικίνδυνη περίοδος για τις γυναίκες που βρίσκονται σε κακοποιητικές σχέσεις, καθώς η βία συχνά αρχίζει ή αυξάνεται κατά τη διάρκειά της.
Πώς μπορείς να πάρεις βοήθεια
Εάν είσαι έγκυος, τότε το ρίσκο αυξάνεται κατά την κακοποίηση. Εάν είσαι σε σπίτι με σκάλες, προσπάθησε να μείνεις στο ισόγειο. Εάν δέχεσαι επίθεση πάρε τη θέση του εμβρύου, είναι μια βοηθητική τακτική για να αποτρέψεις περεταίρω τραυματισμούς.
Οι επισκέψεις στον γιατρό είναι μια καλή ευκαιρία για να συζητήσεις την κατάσταση που βιώνεις στη σχέση σου.
Εάν ο σύντροφός σου πηγαίνει μαζί σου στις επισκέψεις στο γιατρό, προσπάθησε να βρεις μια στιγμή / αφορμή (π.χ όταν θα εξετάζεσαι σε άλλο δωμάτιο) για να μιλήσεις ιδιαιτέρως.
Ετοιμασία για να φύγεις:
Λόγω του ότι η βία μπορεί να αυξηθεί όταν κάποιος προσπαθήσει να φύγει, πιο κάτω θα βρεις χρήσιμες πληροφορίες:
- Κράτησε οποιοδήποτε αποδεικτικό στοιχείο της σωματικής κακοποίησης, όπως φωτογραφίες των τραυμάτων.
- Κράτησε ημερολόγιο όλων των βίαιων περιστατικών, κατέγραψε τις ημέρες ή/και ώρα, τα γεγονότα και τις απειλές, εάν είναι δυνατόν. Κράτησε τα σε ασφαλές μέρος.
- Μάθε πού μπορείς να αποταθείς για βοήθεια. Πες σε κάποιον τι συμβαίνει.
- Εάν είσαι τραυματισμένος/η πήγαινε στον κυβερνητικό γιατρό και ανέφερε τι σου συμβαίνει. Ζήτα να καταγράψουν την επίσκεψή σου και να σου δώσουν χαρτί επιβεβαίωσης.
- Κάνε πλάνο με τα παιδιά σου και αναγνώρισε ένα ασφαλές μέρος γι΄αυτά, ένα δωμάτιο με κλειδαριά ή το σπίτι κάποιου φίλου για βοήθεια. Καθησύχασέ τους ότι η δουλειά τους είναι να παραμείνουν ασφαλείς, όχι να σε προστατέψουν.
- Απόκτησε δεξιότητες εργασίας ή παρακολούθησε όσα περισσότερα μαθήματα μπορείς.
- Προσπάθησε να μαζέψεις και να φυλάξεις χρήματα ή ζήτα από κάποιο φίλο ή συγγενικό πρόσωπο που εμπιστεύεσαι να φυλάει αυτά τα χρήματα για σένα.
Όταν φύγεις:
Σχεδίασε πώς και πότε θα φύγεις γρήγορα. Πριν φύγεις σιγουρέψου ότι έχεις τα πιο κάτω:
Είναι απαραίτητο φεύγοντας από το σπίτι να περάσεις από τον πλησιέστερο αστυνομικό σταθμό της περιοχής σου και να αναφέρεις ότι φεύγεις από το σπίτι σου μαζί με τα παιδιά λόγω ενδοοικογενειακής βίας.
Πιστοποιητικά
- Πιστοποιητικό γέννησης των παιδιών και το δικό σου.
- Χρήματα ή πιστωτικές κάρτες στο όνομά σου.
- Κάρτες κοινωνικής ασφάλισης.
- Άδεια οδηγού.
Νομικά χαρτιά
- Διατάγματα που εκδόθηκαν.
- Άδεια εργασίας και παραμονής.
- Διαβατήρια.
- Άδεια γάμου.
- Χαρτιά διαζυγίου και κηδεμονίας.
- Αποδεικτικά σχολείου.
- Ασφάλεια υγείας.
Τηλέφωνα έκτακτης ανάγκης
- Πλησιέστερου ατυνομικού σταθμού.
- Οικογένειας, φιλικών, συγγενικών προσώπων.
- Πλησιέστερο νοσοκομείο/πρώτες βοήθειες.
- Πλησιέστερος χώρος φιλοξενίας.
Άλλα
- Φάρμακα.
- Κινητό τηλέφωνο.
- Ρούχα για σένα και τα παιδιά.
- Χρήματα έκτακτης ανάγκης.
Αφού φύγεις:
- Άλλαξε τις κλειδαριές και τον αριθμό τηλεφώνου σου.
- Άλλαξε τη διαδρομή για τη δουλειά σου και του σχολείου των παιδιών.
- Ενημέρωσε το σχολείο για την κατάσταση.
- Εάν έχεις διάταγμα για περιοριστικά μέτρα, κράτησε ένα αντίγραφο μαζί σου για όλες τις ώρες.
Για περισσότερες πληροφορίες ανέτρεξε στην κατηγορία ΥΠΗΡΕΣΙΕΣ της ιστοσελίδας μας.
Το πιο πάνω κείμενο είναι από την ιστοσελίδα http://www.thehotline.org/help/
@Copyright – The National Domestic Violence Hotline
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